some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
