IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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