Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
