We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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