I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Randomize
