So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
