I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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