You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
