I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Did we literally take a cab across the street
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
