Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
