i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Randomize
