Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
