the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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