Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
