There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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