I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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