hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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