New low: just hacked my moms facebook
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
