More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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