i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
