He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
