I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
