But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize