dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize