Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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