i'm signing you up for texting rehab
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
