sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize