I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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