I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
