when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
