doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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