If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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