On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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