I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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