cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
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