I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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