She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
