the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
