I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
