I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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