there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
