Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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