I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Rumble strips road head = magical
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
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