i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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