let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
