Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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