i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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