He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
