He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Randomize
