And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
