I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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