...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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